
Friday, November 28, 2008
Thanksgiving Preview

Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Meet The Press
(sorry for the formatting......the paragraphs wouldn't stick!!!)
By CHARLES RAMSAYRegional Editor
Published: Wednesday, November 26, 2008 9:50 PM CST
VIRGINIA — Mike and Michelle Zadra are grateful this holiday season for their new baby, Maeli.Michelle Zadra journeyed to Vietnam and returned home in early October with the 8-month-old newcomer they’ve adopted as their first child. The two had been going together for several years before their marriage more than eight years ago.They were some of the more fortunate couples from the U.S. to be able to adopt a child from another country, as recently very severe restrictions or outright bans have been imposed. A typical wait for a couple to adopt from China had been up to five years before recent changes.Their efforts began in March 2006. They submitted paperwork to an adoption agency for a baby in China. After a year of waiting, the couple decided to also apply to Vietnam for a child. While some countries do not allow applications to other places while one is pending with them, Michelle Zadra said that China did allow it.The adoption process is thorough, and the paperwork is extensive. Medical letters, background checks, FBI fingerprints on file, photos of themselves, checkups on financial means to support a child all must be submitted as part of the documentation. They met with a social worker from the U.S. adoption agency, who made a home visit, collected background on the community and schools and submitted a report.Then last December, they were matched with an available child. But a barrier was soon raised. The province where the child was from was alleged to be involved in baby trafficking, or selling babies for money. The report was determined later to be unfounded, Michelle Zadra said.The couple was told that the agreement to adopt the baby was ended as a result.“I was heartbroken,” Michelle said.“She was going to give up,” Mike said.But then in May, on Mother’s Day 2008 weekend, they got word that a new baby was available for them in Vietnam.“It was the best Mother’s Day gift a person could get,” Michelle Zadra said.More time passed in waiting, more forms were filled and procedures were followed to get ready for the adoption. U.S. Immigration had to be notified, Homeland Security and the FBI were dealt with.Then came the e-mail — come within 1-1/2 weeks.“You wait. You wait,” Mike explained. “When it pops, it’s like the Army’’ in its “hurry up and wait” methods, he added.One more item was needed right away — a passport for Mike, even though he was staying home to work at his job at Dom-Ex in Hibbing. The passport had to be taken along as part of the adoption. “I’m very thankful for the passport people,” he said, as it was received within a week, where normally a passport takes six to eight weeks to process.Medical shots had been obtained during the summer. The only items needed yet were visas, as Vietnam is still a Communist country.Michelle left on her journey Sept. 19, accompanied by her mother, Bonnie Prigge, 70, and her sister, Kim Grippe, 48.“Her very first plane trip ever,” Michelle said of her mother.They arrived in Hanoi after a long flight, met with five other American families who were adopting, and took several side trips while waiting the first few days for paperwork to proceed.Their lodgings were not what one might expect.The three women stayed at the “Hanoi Hilton’’ downtown, where U.S. prisoners of war including Sen. John McCain were held during the Vietnam War.The complex has been refurbished, into condominiums, a hotel and shops. The three women stayed in a two-bedroom apartment, with a balcony, kitchen and laundry. Their apartment overlooked the old prison area where U.S. POWs were held.Besides the heat, traffic in downtown Hanoi can be overwhelming, with thousands of motorbikes burning exhaust and motorists honking a lot, Michelle recalled.Finally the day arrived. The three journeyed out to Bac Ninh Orphanage, the province being about an hour’s drive from Hanoi. It was not the province where their first adoption process had fallen through.They went on a tour of the spartan orphanage, where numerous babies were waiting to be adopted. Their first live glimpse of the baby they would name Maeli came during the giving and receiving ceremony, where a child is given to the new family.There is a bond between orphanage staffers and their charges, Michelle noted, as “when the nanny handed her to me she (the staffer) cried.’’Maeli had been left outside the orphanage during the early morning of March 9, when a security guard noticed her. Michelle estimates Maeli was probably about 20 days old then. Mike said they consider March 9 as her birthday, so “we’ll stick with her found day.”While the reasons for Maeli’s being given over to the orphanage aren’t known, Michelle said that the “people there are very friendly,’’ polite and hospitable and caring for children. Unlike other countries where babies may be sold for a profit, in Vietnam, the major reason for babies given up for adoption is economic, where some parents might not be able to afford to support a child.“It’s a poor country,” she said.The couple believes they adopted Maeli at a very good age. In China, many children adopted are usually more than a year old, often 16 months, a time when language development in Chinese has already started.“When you grow up in an orphanage, you have a lot of developmental delays,” Michelle explained. A child is not usually worked with one on one, and the ratio between kids and staffers is often five to one.But they have seen Maeli demonstrate an active interest in things around her. “She’s quite ahead in many areas,” Michelle said, as Maeli busily scooted about the floor of a conference room and stopped to study a similar-looking baby in a mirror.The three women and Maeli stayed in Hanoi a few more days, while more paperwork was processed, and a visa for Maeli was obtained from the U.S. embassy. They arrived back in the U.S. and reached the Range by early October.Naming Maeli Jolianne Zadra resulted from relatives on both sides of the family. Michelle’s grandmother, Bessie Mae, has her birthday on March 10, a day away from Maeli’s birthday. Mae is Michelle’s grandmother’s middle name, and the Chinese word Maelui means in part, “beautiful.”The middle name was arrived at from two people: Jodi Desin, a good family friend, and Mike’s grandmother’s first name, Ann.Raising Maeli so far has been easy for the first-time parents, who were allowed to practice by babysitting the children of friends who operate an Asian restaurant.When Maeli first arrived, “she was strictly a formula baby,” Mike said. Now, pureed baby food containing “chicken, beef and turkey is what she wants.”Whether they would adopt a second baby gives Michelle reason to pause. “It took a lot out of me emotionally,” she said. “It was good for the experience.”If they did go through the process again, Michelle said, “You have to be determined. You have to be patient.”The cost for everything, from adoption to the plane fare to Vietnam and back, probably was in the range of $25,000, Mike estimated.This Thanksgiving, the couple feels they have much to be grateful for, from her mother and sister who went with Michelle, to Mike’s employer, Dom-ex, for giving him family leave to help after Maeli arrived, to kindnesses from many people.Most of all, “we’re very thankful for her,” Michelle said. “Such a very good baby.”
Copyright © 2008 - Mesabi Daily News - Virginia, MN
Monday, November 24, 2008
Two Months

Sunday, November 23, 2008
Look Ma...I'm Standing!!
Maelie has decided that standing is THE thing. She is so busy, strong, and smart. She regularly pulls herself up in her crib, and I now have the legs on her busy table toy so she can stand by that...which she does now ALL THE TIME. It used to be a little bit of a struggle for her to stand, but not anymore! She is ready to MOVE, man! Saturday, November 22, 2008
First Fire

Thursday, November 20, 2008
First Steps
She's regularly pulling herself up on things...her table toy, her crib, me and Mike. :) She's a strong little monkey!!!!!!!!!
I love her to bits.
Monday, November 17, 2008
Social Worker Saturday :)

...for no apparent reason, and I thought, uh oh, it's going to be a rip roaring visit with our social worker. We had a two hour drive to meet our social worker Amy, and I thought Maelie would take a nice, long nap on the way there. Wrong, again. Usually, Maelie loves to sleep in the car, but not so much on Saturday. She did manage to sleep for about a half hour.
We met up with Amy and had a lovely, lovely time visiting. Maelie only got fussy towards the end, and I couldn't ask for more than that. She sat very nicely for over an hour. One of the best things throughout our whole adoption process has been Amy. She has always been just the perfect blend of professionalism, and exceptionally friendly. I know I've heard other adoptive families with complaints about their social worker, but ours is just super. My only complaint is that she lives about four hours from us, or we'd be able to visit more often!!
So, suffice to say, our dreaded social worker visit (it wasn't really dreaded...just that irrational niggling of fear over how will my child behave), went extremely well, and I couldn't be more pleased. NOW, I'm sad it's over, because I won't have a chance to visit with Amy again for awhile!!!! Yeah, I know...I'm a trip. First, I'm nervous, now I'm sad it's over. LOL!!
We did learn from Amy that Maelie is ahead of herself in some areas, such as crawling, standing, sitting up, and other gross motor skills. Also, we learned that we're doing things right!!! Maelie goes to bed by herself, we do not rock her to sleep. Maelie's attachment to us is there, Mike and I don't look frazzled...we've been doing something right! It's just nice, especially as a first-time mom, to hear...'Hey! You guys are doing well!!' Yeah!!!!
I was hoping maybe Amy has heard of the ear scratching issue before, but no. Our child is unique in that regard. And in a few others...Maelie does NOT like to eat fruits, veggies, or cereal. She likes baby food meat. I KNOW...weird!!! And, Amy agreed, it's uncommon. We have found Maelie likes the combination baby dinners of vegetable beef or chicken and carrots, etc. Go figure! But, it's a real fight to get her to eat any kind of fruit. That's Daddy's girl...loving meat.
But, to wrap up talking about our social worker visit, it went extremely well, was enjoyable, informative, and just plain fun. Thanks again, Amy!!!! You've helped us make our dream come true, and you'll always be a friend...heck...a member of the family!!!!!!!

Friday, November 14, 2008
Owliness, Dinner, and Ears
Yeah....she looks comfy, but that lasted 5 minutes. Then, the screaming started again and lasted a good half hour. I put her in her jumperoo, and she enjoyed that, and fell asleep. As soon as I tried to move her....WATCH OUT!!! I did give her some benedryl after that, for the coughing and sneezing, and that seemed to do the trick. She calmed right down and then finally took a nap. SIGH.
But tonite now, Mike and I were able to enjoy a fairly calm dinner out at a Vietnamese restaurant...our first!!! It went well, right up until the end when it was time to leave anyway. But, as soon as we got home, she was tired again, and wouldn't go to sleep. We were starting to have a replay of yesterday, but we gave her some benedryl again. So, I think the child is fighting off a little cold or allergy. She doesn't act really sick, but she is coughing, pulling on her throat a little, and sneezing. So, that would explain the fussiness. We keep thinking teething time, too, but there's nothing there yet. At least we got to have a nice, and yummy!, dinner together tonite. Yay!!!!
Tomorrow we meet with our Social Worker for our post-placement report. She is a very nice lady and I'm really looking forward to seeing her again. We haven't since our first homestudy in 2006. It's stupid of me, I know, but I honestly feel a little apprehensive about it! It just must be that 'social worker' name phobia, just like people have when they hear the word 'dentist.' :)
We've been having a ton of problems with Maelie's ear, too. I was so hoping it would heal before we saw the social worker, but, I have to keep remembering that she doesn't expect us to have the 'perfect' child. This ear issue is going to drive us all batty, though. When we got her at the orphanage, her nanny told us that she scratches her ear when she gets tired. I had noticed a little scab on her ear at the time and was relieved that it wasn't scabies. But, every time Maelie goes to fall asleep, she scratches her ear. BADLY. She has scratched it raw. The poor little ear has cracks in it, scabs, and it bleeds. All over. A few weekends ago, she woke up from her nap screaming. I went in to check on her, since she hadn't been asleep that long, and her little face was completely smeared with blood. Her bed was full, her clothes, her bottle, EVERYTHING. Luckily, Mike was home, since it was the weekend, and was there with me. I knew what it was from, but just seeing her like that was awful. We gave her a bath and I held her afterward and just cried. Adrenaline letdown, I think. She's done that a few more times since then, but not quite as bad. But, this is why I really get concerned when she gets overtired and won't go to sleep...she starts the scratching.
I just am at a loss as to how to stop this behavior. We keep her nails cut short, she now wears TWO socks on the hand she scratches with...but she can still pull them off. We can direct her little hand away from her ear when we put her to bed, but if she wakes up in the middle of the night or from her nap, she will start scratching again. It's not only outside her ear, but inside, too. I've worried about her actually rupturing her eardrum, although I've been assured that this is highly improbable...the ear drum is not easy to reach!! We have been putting medicine and ointment on her ear to help the healing, but as soon as it heals, she's scratching it up again. One thing I have found that is healing it FAST is Badger Balm Healing. WOW. Talk about healing the large cracks in a hurry!!!
But, as much as I can try to heal it, I don't know how to stop it!!! If anyone has any tips out there, or has dealt with this before, please let me know. I feel like such a bad mom when people look at her little ear. I get asked all the time, 'Does she have an ear infection??' NO!!! It's been checked a few times now, and it's fine. She just scratches. But, how lousy do I feel when people see this beautiful little girl and this scratched up ear??? One day, after a bad night of scratching, the poor little ear looked burned.
Anyway, my point was, I was hoping her little ear would be healed before we met with our social worker tomorrow, but no, she's scratched it to bleeding again tonite. I'm sure the social worker will understand, but I still feel like a bad mommy!!!!!!!!!
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Maelie's Fashion Pics
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Luncheon Engagement
She did it!
Then, last night, when I tucked her into her crib, I hid in her room for a minute. Sure enough, she stood up in her crib by herself!!!! She's still too little to fall out, thank goodness, but, she did it!!!!
My big girl!!!!
Monday, November 10, 2008
Maelie's Fashion Pics
Update - Okay, not really an update, but more of an observation. I cannot stop looking at this photo of her. I don't know why, but I think she is just absolutely gorgeous in this photo. It's like her hair is perfect, her little mouth.....I know, I know, I'm baised, but I just had to say it. :)Sunday, November 9, 2008
8 Months Old
I love her more than mere words could ever express.
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Bathtime With Daddy
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Monday, November 3, 2008
Someone Truly Watches out for Us

Saturday, November 1, 2008
Fun with Mirrors

Auntie Kimmie trying to feed her a little chicken and mashed potatoes...
"What is this....poison????"
Happy Halloweenie!!!
I had wished we would have gotten to a few more places last night...but we just ran out of time. So, we're sorry to everyone we missed! But, enjoy the photos. :)


Auntie Carol gave her a little teddy bear.

Auntie Kim & Maelie discuss candy, I think...

Uncle Dave & Maelie chillin'

Tutu Butt!!!









